i'm wearing debb's dress. 

and she's wearing my dress.. 

two piggies. 

heeee... 

me and cousie, peijun. 

us! 

debb and desmond.. love them! 

debb and denise 

me posing..  

debb posing 

kiss the bride!! 

me and aunt yin 

three monkeys from my dad's salon.. 

debb and the pau! 

what is love and relationship?

i woke up at 7a.m. this morning and i saw harvey online... we talked a while and i went back to sleep. things are totally different now. i don't know what is wrong with me.

i don't know who to turn to now. last weekend, i went to my sister's place for afterparty. so, i was sitting at the balcony of her 13th-floor condo alone, smoking a cigarette.. i was doing some thinking.. and i looked down at the swimming pool, which is not so far away from her block. as i was looking down, i wonder.. "how it's gonna be like to jump down from a tall building like this? what is the feeling when a person is going down?? how it feels when a person landed from the jump???" i was so curious that time.. and suddenly, i felt a chill from my neck down to my spine.. i got paranoid and went in the house to avoid other unthinkable scene to happen. it's funny how a person's mind work during certain times. and it's scary too..

so, few hours after that, i went back to the balcony for another cig.. this time, korkor is with me.. he knows i'm not feeling good. i told him i wanted to talk.. but nobody wants to listen anymore. he told me that he'll be there whenever possible.. and he told me.. "it's okay to let it out.. it's okay to tell me.. BUT.. no emo emo, no cry cry ah...." (hehe) he's nice.. though he's always with his harsh tone and all.. but that's just the way he brought himself in the public.. with his behaviour, people won't dare to undermine him.. i seriously respect him for being able to control his emotions well. (korkor, if you're reading this, i really meant what i said... love you!!! muahxxx!!!) so i told him what's bothering me.. too bad i didn't have the chance to finish what i was telling him.. but i'm sure there'll be next time.. *winkz*

one good thing i like bout hanging at my sister's place is that... her friends are super nice people.. i know they won't let me down (in terms of comforting and protecting me).. they really have the ability to make me forget bout my problems and enjoy myself..

i know they love me and they will protect me if whatever shit happens to me. *grins*

well, sometimes, i wonder what is a relationship.. and what is love...? i'm sure there are different interpretations on those terms..

just wanted to share my thoughts..

love is not about taking and keeping.. it is not about dominating and conquering.. not hoping too much.. not just waiting for something to happen.. not about "you" or "me"..

it's about giving and learning how to let go.. sharing and giving in.. to make things happen and go through it together.. it's about "us".. it's about understanding and not to take anything too personal.. it's about being sensitive and alert..


[music on air]
yesterday by the beatles.

[current mood]
lagging.

[quote of the day]
learn to stand up yourself after a fall, so that you won't be afraid of falling in the future.

[next station]
tv time...!