a new beginning

started new job for a week and i can see that i'll be very very busy from now onwards. though the company is small, i know that i can learn a lot from there. hopefully everything will go smoothly for me. i cannot let myself and everyone around me down again. especially those who are close to me. especially my ex boss. especially Smelly. i cannot afford to hurt them again and again, seeing me go aimlessly not knowing my direction even though i'm already holding a map and compass. i cannot fail them endlessly. i cannot waste my time anymore. cos i'm not young already. i've got wrinkles forming in the corner of my eyes. fine lines are more visible on my neck. back is getting hurt from sitting too long in the office. sigh! signs of aging..

oh.. last weekend we had farewell dinner for Gary and Joyce. they're migrating to NZ. hope they will have a wonderful new life there. photos coming up soon... IF i have the time to arrange it.

went for a drink and some shopping with Ann. omg... it's been like.. a year since we last went out. good to know that we've not drifted apart, like most best friends do after a while not seeing each other. i'm so glad that i've wonderful besties. two is enough for me... quality is always more important than quantity ;)

p/s: ann, we should hang out more often yea?

i is back!

back from Bangkok last Monday. too lazy to upload photos cos Opera and Safari is damn stupid. can't organize the photos. 

summary: Bangkok is definitely NOT a place for me and Smelly. cos he doesn't really like shopping. and seeing him waiting for me while i do is a bit of a pain la.. kesian him.. another thing is.. the hotel that i stayed in is very inconvenient. far from shopping area. far from taxi stand. far from BTS station (have to walk at least 10 minutes). a bit regret that i didn't consult David, a good friend in Bestour.

so people, next time don't pandai pandai like me, do research online only, never ask properly. 

i've uploaded the photos in facebook so not gonna put it all here again.

us at The Dome at State Tower. celebrate my birthday ma.. but mana tau, this skybar punya view is not that nice cos it's not fully open air (should've went to the one at Banyan Tree Hotel). and it costs us over rm100 for 2 drinks. my advice... don't go to any of the skybars. better buy liquor from supermarket or 7-eleven there. damn cheap.

at angkor wat

we wanted to go Wat Pho, The Sleeping Buddha and the Grand Palace but then we didn't know that we can't go in with shorts (another reminder: please DO RESEARCH PROPERLY before you travel next time!) so we went to another temple instead. it was a small temple. only open to public on selected days. we were lucky that so happen it was open the day we went there.

we bought some joss stick and candles and it came with a small piece of paper. we threw it away not knowing what was it for.. after praying, we got to know that the paper is for us to scrape off the gold on the Buddha statue and bring it home. it'll bring good luck.

-_-

no. we didn't take it back from the dustbin though i really feel like doing so. but then.. it was the heart that counts, right?

went to Chatuchak, Pratunam and Suan Lum night market.  another advice is... you can choose to go either one of the above mentioned place. cos the things they sell are all the same. personal advice: go to Pratunam Market, opposite Platinum shopping center (Platinum also selling the same thing in Pratunam but price a bit different cos one got air cond, one don't have). don't have to waste your time shopping in Suan Lum cos it's like our Petaling Street. they cut tourists punya throat like we slaughter chicken for Chinese New Year. but can go there for food though.

er...

overall it was a tiring trip cos we spent too much time in the taxi cos Bangkok's traffic jam is terrible and the hotel is far. we're definitely going for beach holiday next time!

oh yeah... Happy Birthday to ME!!!

birthday gift from Peks...

new hair!

cos she always say my hair style is very "liong" so she insisted that i pay a visit to Shawn Cutler. so how? nice? Smelly said it's nicer than how daddy always cut it (shhhh... don't let daddy know ok!).

hmm... should i cut it short again?? 

salty food is for porridge.

Since the minced pork is too salty, i've decided to cook porridge on Sunday. so i went to get some canned makerel with black bean and perserved vege to go with it.. no need took... just heat it up and we're ready to eat! but cooking poridge is quite mah fan cos need to keep on stiring it so that it won't burn. (it's actually my first time cooking porridge! lol!) so i called daddy to get some idea on how to actually cook porridge (paiseh..) cos i scared it came out not like rice, not like porridge.. die. luckily i did well. i'm soo proud of myself... oh... told daddy about my too salty minced pork and he gave me some tips how to make it better! shouldn't have used soy sauce to marinate! oh well... will cook better next time!

makerel with black bean. taste better than the usual fish with black bean cos it's not too dry.

my fav preserved vege stem!!

the leftover pork.

my bowl of porridge! oh.. i forgot to snap a photo of my FAVOURITEst "foo yu" (fermented beancurd?) yummy! i like!!!!

i'm sure he said something funny stupid.

i should cook more nowadays.. save money, healthier food.. (though sometimes it's canned food.. lol).. if i have the time sure i'll cook more...but since Smelly's mom is back today, i guess i'll just let the veteran do the job.. lol!

what's for dinner?

Smelly's parent went to Lake Toba for a holiday last weekend so we're home alone. since both of us were too lazy to drive out to get food, i decided to look in the fridge for something that i can cook. found some minced pork and prawns. so i fried the minced pork, fried prawns with eggs and vege. it's the best that i could get cos the fridge is nearly empty...

fried minced pork. TOO salty that we only ate one piece each.

since the pork is too salty, i didn't put any salt or soy sauce in the egg. taste perfect!
Smelly said eggs are naturally tasty so no matter how you cook it, it's gonna taste good! gah!

stri fry siu bak choy.

healthy meal.

But Smelly said it's too dry... grr.. should've made meatball soup instead of frying it.. cos he's actually sick..


very satisfied with my cooking! hahahahah! come to think of it.. it's been a while since i last cooked a full meal like this.. at least two years since i last cooked! no time lah..

Mother's Day '09

So last week was Mother's Day... we're supposed to go dinner with gramma but Shorty ffk (ps- gramma misses Eva! please arrange a time to see her after she's back from Taiwan cos she'll be going to Melbourne with 2nd gramma in June!). so i went dimsum with gramma and 2nd gramma on Mother's Day.

at night, i suggested to bring Smelly's mom for dinner cos i know Smelly wouldn't do anything if i didn't plan it. initially, we wanted to go Duck King at Jaya One (i think..) and i was very excited cos i've never been there. Smelly been there few times and he raved about the duck there. we supposed to go out at about 6pm but Smelly's mom got guest at home and we waited til about 8pm. so we had to go somewhere else for duck.. i think we went to Seapark.. Smelly said they have similar duck.. so disappointed that i didn't get to try Duck King. hmph..

the duck.

got the drumstick!

some pumpkin dish. it has mushroom, abolone slice, sea cucumber, scallop.. er.. dunno what else. quite nice. i like the pumpkin! very sweet and tasty!

love the mushroom!

dunno what fish. very fresh! i like! but it's like.. RM70 for this dish alone! damn expensive right? and it's only half the fish! the pumpkin is only RM50.. grr.. seafood..

family photo. (Smelly's brother went fishing. i think he forgot about Mother's Day though.. lol... )

we actually ordered seong tong nai bak er... vege soup.. but then it never came so we cancelled our order.. overall the food was delicious. i'd rate 7/10. it's packed when we arrived. i think due to Mother's Day. but then Smelly said normal day also very packed cos people go for the duck... i forgot what's the restaurant's name though...

can't wait to try Duck King!

Melaka.0309

Finally have the time to post up some photos here.. ok.. so I went to Melaka with Vincent in March (i know.. damn long d right?) not knowing how exactly to go, we just fuel up the tank and drove down to Melaka. Being a safer "adventurist", Vincent bought a map while i pump the petrol. actually i planned to go Cherating that weekend but he said he don't have enough time to do research so we went to Melaka instead. at least nearer...

we started our journey at about 2pm.. reached there about 4 and the first stop we went to is the chicken rice ball shop.

my plate of rice balls. so-so only

Vincent likes it with dark soy sauce.

my favourite dish. but too bad, it's COLD. yes... it's cold. it's either they scooped it out for hours or they forgot to make it hot. NOT NICE. what a disappointment. better luck in finding a nice chicken rice ball stall next time!

after that, we went for a walk at Jonker Street. it's just like normal pasar malam. a lot of food stalls and when we passed by each stalls, we're like.. "wanna try??" then we'll agree to "try later after the walk". then we came by this shop who's selling asam laksa. we were both salivating.. probably because both of us likes asam laksa.. then beside the stall, it's another stall who sells asam laksa. but looked like very full. so we decided to join the crowd and lined up for it.

remember this.

after 10 minutes of waitng in line, we finally got our laksa. because we're still full from rice, we only ordered one bowl to share. BIG MISTAKE.

cos it's so the very delicious that we're both fighting for it!!!

only remember to take a photo after we drank the soup. lol!

look at him...

see? i'm not kidding! it's like the best asam laksa!! btw, that's Nyoya Asam Laksa that he ordered.. they have quite a few types of laksa to choose from.

chendol. it's quite nice but too "coconutty" for my liking.

look at the people waiting to get that bowl of laksa..

and the stall beside it is like.. totally opposite!

after laksa, we walked a while and went hunting for satay celup.

we're too full so we ordered only a few sticks.. it's not as good as i remembered though..

oh.. bought a lot of dodol home as well.. and some of it will be delivered to NY for veyBoy cos he's craving for it! heheh.. can we actually post food overseas??

this trip is short but fun. too bad we didn't have camera with us.. we both forgot to charge our camera! who wants to go Melaka with me next time???

melaka trip photos coming up!

grr..

there's so many things that i wanted to talk about. write about. bitch about. gah!

even though i'm not working now, it's funny that i can't seem to find time to write properly. i don't want to forget a lot of things. there's just so many things that i wanted to keep in record but somehow... words in my mind can't seem to flow out as i wanted every time i started writing. ugh.

one day.

i'm waiting for my verbal diarrhea.

i can sense it's coming soon.

you wait!

bad decision made.

not the end.

far from the end.

the journey has just begun...

fuck you!

i've resigned.

yes. you read it correctly.

I'VE RESIGNED from the new job that i've worked just for 5 days. 

that fucking arrogant piece of shit director just made me realised that i've made a WISE decision to leave that company.

no wonder you don't have a long-term staff.

now i know why.

so long..

so today will be my last day in Kurnia.

quite a very jinxed day cos my stomach is full of gas since 11pm last night. i couldn't do anything but to bear with the pain that come and go the WHOLE FREAKING NIGHT! so the pain started from the upper abdomen and by the time i finally woke up for work, the pain moved to the lower abdomen.

pff!

i hope it will move all out soon cos it's annoying to have the pain but no shit come out!! grrr!

another jinxed moment is that the stupid coffee machine decided to DIE ON ME when i wanted to make the LAST cup of coffee for my boss before he went outstation this morning! (i managed to make him Nescafe though... only drank 2 sips and he rushed off!)

sobz!

even last few days, there are few series of unfortunate events happened.. maybe i'm meant to stay!

whatever.

note to self : dy, don't be silly.. you've made a decision and there's no right or wrong decisions.. there's only good or bad! don't.. don't.. dont even think about it you evil brain!

ok.

off to lunch!

I Am Feeling Adventurous!

It’s been 3 years since the last time I’ve caught a hangover.

Not.Funny.At.All.Damn.Sen.Fu.

My head is spinning like madness.

I don’t understand why people actually liked drinking.

I got no choice. But you have a choice… why drink leh?

But then again, if you don’t drink, I won’t make money.

How ironic.

******************************************

woohoo!! off to Cherating this weekend!!

it's an ad hoc trip. i just thought about it this morning and i texted a few people.. many can't make it cos it's too short notice. but my best friend, Ann (i love you! muah muah!) replied and agreed to go with me! so the two of us will go together and relax for the weekend (bonding after so long didn't see each other!!).. sun.. beach.. books.. turtles.. camwhoring! yay!! i feel damn adventurous cos it's like so last minute and it's gonna be our girl's day out and both of us never been there before! but then i still feel a bit dangerous for two girls to go alone.. so, i texted Deric and he said he'll go if Shirley(his fiance) is going.. so i kinda left Shirley with no choice but to agree cos she got no plan yet and my plan is her plan.. lol! so off we'll go!! (hopefully they won't ffk me). will go home and ask Ming if he wanna follow us.. still waiting for Kenny and Peks' reply..

Farewell With A Heavy Heart.

I finally went in and see my boss.

I told him that I wanted to resign and he persuaded me to stay.

I nearly cried. I was kinda holding back those tears.

Of course, I also nearly thought of dropping the idea of resigning after what he told me. Some encouraging words of wisdom. But I didn’t succumb to that idea cos I know it’s not what I wanted. Though I know this is a very comfortable place to work in, a place where I can learn many things but at the end of the day, it’s not what I’m looking forward to. Like he said, “you already have the right attitude, just that you don’t have the passion. All you need is to put in a lil bit of effort and passion into what you’re doing. It’s not about job. It’s about the passion. You HAVE to like what you’re doing..”

I told him I don’t think I can be a good secretary. I don’t think I can do it.

“You cannot think that way. How do you know you can’t do it? Don’t look down on yourself… you have to think that you can… you have to have positive thinking…”

“I think this is not what I wanted and it’s not what I’m good at…”

So I told him that I’ve made up my mind and he also agreed that if my heart is not here, it’s difficult to do things. Totally agree.

I’m gonna miss having a nice boss like him!

*sobz*

Home pc was spoilt. Don’t know what's wrong with it. Can’t seem to turn it on. We suspected that it got struck by lightning cos the house phone is spoilt too.

So there’ll be no photos until it’s fixed.

I’ve drafted a post on my facial product purchase 2 weeks ago, but the card reader was spoilt so no photos yet. Now the pc spoilt.. grr.

Oh.. I heard that Stila is having clearance sale. I was at Pavilion last Saturday and I didn’t notice! Hmphh.. should’ve drop by and use my vouchers on cosmetics instead of some stupid lingerie that I don’t get to wear huh..

Eh.. randomness… I think I started to like it Blackberry! Though I still think that it’s a bit bulky. Ok.. Blackberry shall be my next target! But then.. iPhone sounds great too. But.. touch screen is a major turn off for me. For a phone lah.. cos I think it’s not so convenient. Stick to Blackberry *dream*

brainless conversation.

me: ok
so my 2-balls are gutless

vincent: hahah
u where got balls one
u got hai only

me: i got 2 tits ma.. round also
can consider as balls

vincent: tiu
cha lan tou

me: hahaha

vincent: yalorr
then u also made up decision liao

me: ya.. but i dunno how to tell my boss ma

vincent: u go in
and tell la u have something u wanna tell him
then tell lo
this one u can honest say
not like u need to cock

me: haih... why is it so hard to resign this time...
the last time all also very easy one

vincent: coz the ppl are kind mah
last time u sudah dulan one
but this time is not really dulan mah

me: yawor.. come to think of it.. last time all boss also nothing to shout about.
nothing for me to stay

vincent: yalorr

me: but this time.. boss so good until i dunno how to break his heart
hahah

vincent: so u see, ur boss also good
so is like u wanna break up with ur bf, but ur bf did ntg wrong
lolz

me: mahai
must use this example meh
i terasa one u know
HAHAHAHA

vincent: HAHAHAHAHAHAH
i pura bodoh lo
but is gd example mah

me: cb

My 2-Balls Are Gutless.

So I have made a decision to resign from my current job.

 

Time to move on to the next station.

 

The thing is... I don't know how to do it. I kinda chickened out just before I'm going in to see my boss this morning, which is my supposedly planned best time to tender my resignation.

 

My boss is, no doubt, a very nice boss and very nice man in general. He gave me no difficulty in my job but the longer I work with him, the more I feel that I'm not fit for the job. Like I said, even my close friend cum ex-colleague told me that I am definitely not a Personal Assistant material, which I kinda agree.

 

I feel bad for not being able to meet up to his standard. I feel bad that I'm so lost in this industry and not taking much initiative to be better (maybe it's really because I don't have much interest in insurance generally). I feel bad to have such a goldfish memory. I feel bad that I'm not sensitive enough in certain areas. I definitely feel bad when the CEO's PA is damn good compared to me. Like heaven and hell. I kinda feel like I'm not much of a help to him.

 

When I first join this company, I thought that I can do better than before. I thought that I'm well-prepared. I thought that it's gonna be easy. I thought that I can become a super-PA. But I was wrong. I am not suitable for this position. At all.

 

For a person who can't sit still, I'm considered doing a good job for this whole 6 months. This place, for a lot of people, is a very comfortable place. Fixed working hours. Fixed days. Good benefits, like lunch, medical, gym, more AL compared to most small companies etc. but for me, this is not the things that matter most. I needed something more exciting. That lil something that keeps me motivated and keep me striving for more. of course, the new job awaiting for me have less AL, more working hours/days, less benefits cos it's not a big company, but the things that I'll learn and the experience that I'll get in return, I think it's worth it. I cannot say it's 100% worthwhile, but at least I know it's something that I'll love doing.

 

Now.. how am I going to tell my boss that I wanted to leave?

 

He's such a nice boss. It hurts to think that I'm letting him down.