A delayed fifthnniversary thoughts.
Without realizing, five years passed. When I started going out with Smelly, I’ve never thought that we’ll last this long. Considering my age when I met him and especially my personality, it’s amazing how we can preserve this relationship to where we are now.
Things progressed rather smoothly, despite his usual discontentment about my body size and almost out-of-control credit card debts, and my never-ending annoyance with his obsession with gaming and lack of sensitivity towards my feelings. I guess that’s how things are supposed to work.
I used to think that we’re not a normal couple. But after listening to so many relationship stories from friends, I felt blessed and grateful for what I have. One can never be too greedy and keep wishing for the impossible, yet cannot be too contented with what we have. So I guess everything needs balance.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Fifthnniversary.
still sober at 16:54 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: anniversary, love, smelly, thoughts
Monday, January 10, 2011
I Love CW - Girls Edition!
still sober at 11:40 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: celebrations, friends, Monday Loves, vanity, weekends
Monday, January 03, 2011
New Year....
Same old unresolved resolution. Hah!
Let’s see what I have in mind for this year.
- To achieve my already 5-year-old plan (which is *what else* : to be thinner), by going to gym regularly and healthier diet (may the force be with me. Amitabha).
- To settle all (if not, half) the debts by first quarter (this time, is for real! I’m almost there. Pray for bonus. Amen.)
- Which leads to – finally save up for rainy days.
- Hopefully to pass N5 Japanese Language Proficiency Test (JLPT).
- Spend more time with family.
- Finish reading all the 30+ books that I bought in 2009 and 2010.
- To be more focused.
Actually hor… most of the above are my all-time resolution that I didn’t get around materializing it. I admit that I’m such a procrastinator. And a liar. Pfft.
I sense that this year, besides being monotonous, it will be rather tough. Had a sudden fear of the unknown and uncertainties. Not sure why though. Been thinking a lot lately about many things.
Year 2010 passed too fast. Besides keeping my promise to go for Japanese class, I guess everything’s the same for me. oh.. Not forgetting, thanks to my work, I travelled to many states in Malaysia that I never step into. Also thanks to my company, I get to go Beijing for our company trip. =D not forgetting also, last year, I travelled to Bangkok for the third time, went to Gem Island, annual trip to Cameron Highlands, and went to Singapore after 5 years. This year, hopefully will get to go New Zealand, planning to go with dad. Oh.. also to Japan in year end with Smelly, if everything goes smoothly (pray to win lottery).
still sober at 17:46 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: personal
I Love Anniversary! (or not!)
another new year celebrated without Smelly.
damn stupid.
Smelly's colleague's farewell on the eve and he was supposed to join me and his friends for karaoke after dinner. mana tau they went for drinks after dinner and got stuck there and end up cannot make it to countdown with us.
not even a text saying Happy New Year AND Happy Anniversary!!! pfft.
what made me angry was when i reached home at 1.30a.m, i found him in the toilet, vomiting. and he stayed in the toilet for more than one hour before he decided that he had enough of vomiting. ugh.
pissed drunk and a pissed girlfriend. mad angry at his colleague and boss. of ALL night, why choose NYE to celebrate! grrrr.
so the next day, i made him promise to get a camera for me as an apology. *smart eh* but dilemma now cos new model coming out, maybe n April. hmm.
anyway, obligatory anniversary photo. nah!
still sober at 12:46 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: anniversary, Monday Loves
Monday, December 27, 2010
I Love Celebrations!
still sober at 10:40 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: celebrations, friends, Monday Loves
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Shifting Priorities
Two more Fridays before the New Year begins. Scary how time flies. As usual, everything seemed so blurry. Everything happened so fast, like nothing happens before. Another year passed without a sense of achievement. I know by saying that, it shows how weak I am. How little confidence I have. How suck I am in juggling priorities. How lazy. How naïve. Very immature in some ways.
Perhaps what they say is true. When you reach certain age, your priorities shift. What was important might mean nothing now. What was precious might be useless. What deemed insignificant might be the key to success. What seems materialistic became realistic. It became necessity. It became priority. It became the battery of life.
Every year around this time, I will reflect at the past. I think of all the things that happened and did not. The things that I encountered and missed. People that I met and friends that I’ve lost. Experiences that I gained, judgments and decisions that I’ve made, wrong or right. Tears that I’ve shed, happy or sad. Words that came out, thoughtful or hurtful. Screams that were made, angry or excited.
I realized that I learn something new every day. About things that are significant or petty… people around me, people that I love, and people that I loathe… about myself, my emotions, my priorities…
It almost always end up with me being so confused and frustrated at one point, and then the so called problems /issues suddenly don’t seems to be a problem/issue at all… it’s like magic… but I believe it’s just PMS… pfft.
Lately, I’ve concluded that my brain stop progressing. It’s stagnant. I felt wasted… I don’t know… maybe it’s the people around me. By people, I really do actually mean colleagues. I felt that everybody is so comfortable of their (old) way of doing things and their level of acceptance towards new ideas/ ways is super low, or rather selective. By everybody, I do actually mean bosses… So I believe no matter how much effort I invest in whatever I do, the result is never like what I imagined. I felt stupid and limited, yet I cannot do anything about it because it’s just the way they are. But if I don’t do anything about it, I’m afraid that they will think that I’m stupid. Damn conflict. I’m just afraid that I’ll slowly morph into what they are.
Sigh.
still sober at 14:09 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: thoughts
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Cough Syrup + Flu Med Combo
Today is one of those days when I woke up, went to work, and felt empty.
I don’t know.. I blame it on the drugs (cough syrup and flu med) due to the bad coughing and nightmares of losing my teeth (I found out that my bottom retainers don’t fit anymore. fml. Wearing top retainers every night from now.)
Last week was the end of a series of seminar that I worked on. 14 locations within 6 months. So much of travelling throughout Malaysia. Had fun despite some difficulties along the way. I guess the thing that I’ll be missing the most is… obviously the travel allowance that I get. Heheh.
Been thinking about a lot of things lately. Past, present, future. Everything seems so… mediocre. Is this what I wanted all along? Is this supposed to be? Will it be different, if I took the road not chosen? How is it like, if some decisions were made differently? How will it change, if words are spoken in another way? There are so many endless possibilities. Maybe better. Maybe worse. At the end of the day, someone will just tell you to “count your blessings, forget the past, enjoy the present and look forward to the future”. Cliché, but it’s kinda true. That’s what most probably kept me moving all along. Life is as simple as it is. It’s the human heart and brain that makes it difficult (or in some cases, someone makes it difficult). Sigh.
I guess I better stop writing and layan the cough syrup+flu med high now.
still sober at 12:54 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: random
Monday, December 13, 2010
I Love Lazy Weekends!
No photo cos i refused to post up more shitty photos here. *hint for Christmas present - CAMERA*
last weekend was spent lazing off my butt.
Smelly bought a new TV cos he bought a PS3 just to play Gran Turismo (GT) 5. pfft. which took the whole study desk space to put the TV and his butt stuck on half of the bed most of the time when he's home.
brighther side for me, i can finally watch movies with a bigger screen. ok lah... give and take (or not?).
went to Times Square for the GT5 roadshow just to see and try the steering wheel console cos we're planning to get one. now we need to think of a perfect place to place the console IF we really gonna get it. which, on a side note, (i hope) will accelerate the process of us getting a new place.
gonna start going to gym tonight after work. hopefully can last this time.
still sober at 12:55 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: Monday Loves, weekends
Monday, December 06, 2010
How Relationship Lasts IX
Every night before bed, I will demand for a goodnight kiss and a hug. It’s a routine for as long as I can remember. cos I think it's important, as a reminder of my existence (insecure, I know... pffft whatever...).
Anyway, our relationship is very comical... sometimes I don't know whether to laugh or cry because we humour each other so much.
So last night, Smelly kissed me (more like his nose pressing on my nose) and he asked... “What do you see?” I opened my eyes, without moving away, I said, “I see your eyes loh..”
Smelly : Got one eye only right?
Dy : -____- ! er.. hehe.. got 2 eyes become one eye!! Crossed d!
Then, I asked, “What do you see?”
He said…. “Ngor tai dou yat gau fan shu… (I saw a potato). Wakakakakakaaa….!”
T_T damn jahdou.
Tell me lah… where to find a boyfriend like him??? Pfft!
I Love Dragone & Margarita!
still sober at 10:24 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: experience, friends, glutton dy, Monday Loves
Friday, December 03, 2010
2 unbelievable accidents in a year.
still sober at 11:26 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Thursday, December 02, 2010
I'm Hot!
Yesterday I learnt that Smelly thinks that I’m hot.
Smelly : You're hot.
dy: *pretend dunno* Thank you!
Smelly : duwan... you're too hot!! Go away...
dy : wah…. Thank you wor.. *kiss*hug*monkey face*victory!!!*
Definition of the above conversation: hot; referring to body temperature. By Smelly definition; high body temperature is equivalent to over-sufficient body fats covering the bones to warm up the body.
The end.
still sober at 16:02 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
of enemies and troubles.
I came back from Beijing with mild sore throat and nose blocked for about a week. Not exactly the best feeling, especially when I couldn’t really taste what I ate. But not as bad as Shorty though.. she had a terribly flu and her taste bud went absolute bonkers. Actually the weather lately is super crazy. One minute it was mad hot and stuffy, another minute it gets all gloomy and rain heavily. Almost half of my colleagues are sick. Not sure if it’s because of the Beijing trip or KL weather is just nuts.
Okay. I’m gonna stop talking about the boring weather.
I was gonna rant about a lot of things that happened lately. But I’m too tired to even care anymore. It’s just major waste of time. I know some of you are waiting for my classic “jahdou” and ranty posts (hikhik) but since I told you guys d, no need lah… wait til the time bomb explode again then I’ll write a long one. heh.
Okay.. I changed my mind.
You see.. this year, there are so many shitty things happened to me (luckily not major ones lah). Work wise, it was considered good if not great, BUT… (see? There’s always a BUT) .. there’s ALWAYS a bitch who just like to ruin your good life. Pfft. First, there’s a colleague who like to make my life miserable by making things difficult. But me being me, I use all my energy to accommodate him and try to understand the reason behind his attitude/character and of course, for me, work is just work. So I don’t take it personal and most of the time, I just don’t care if he is going to be annoyed or angry, as long as I get my work done and I don’t mind being scolded at, because again, it’s just work. So after a while, I learned that he was not a bad person after all. Just that a lot of people cannot stand the way he does things and found him unbearable and hard to get along. After half a year working together, we’re kinda good friends/colleagues. Until today, a lot of them still don’t understand how I can get along and work with him. I’ll always remember how mom always says, “if someone treated you badly, you don’t have to treat them bad too. In contrast, you have to treat them better than you already did. One day, they will understand.” And yes, I believe in karma too.
But that was not only it… one enemy down and a new enemy turn up! Wtf.. nonstop cycle! This one is a major bitch if you ask me. I have never met or known any colleagues like this in my 7 years of working experience! Omg.. I don’t even know where and how to start describing her… she is super spoilt as a daughter, girlfriend AND colleague. Seriously.. if she work somewhere else, I think she can’t even stand a day. She is also super whiny and likes to complain every single thing to my boss. Long story. But to cut it, my boss is also another lembik one. I’m not even sure if I want to respect him after what he portrayed himself to be. But I guess I respect him as just my boss, nothing more than that. Cos he seems to be biased and I super hate favoritism between bosses and staffs. I mean.. I’m aware that favoritism is normal, but not to that extend lah… another thing is.. I super hate it when we (all the other colleagues) talk to him, he never really pay attention and ALWAYS have his eyes laying on her direction. Grrr!!! Wtf! my things are not urgent meh! He ALWAYS go to her direction when I’m halfway talking to him!! Damn cibai one I tell you…
If I were to go on and talk about her, I think 3 days 3 nights also not enough. Pfft. I’m damn pissed.
Not only colleagues that are giving me problems… friends-turned-enemy also giving me so much trouble. Luckily I have nothing to hide and things just died after ignoring it. Seriously. Ignorance is bliss. No point arguing with bimbo who act godly and strong when inside, she’s just another vulnerable psycho.
Oh.. and BFFs who are damn stubborn. I wonder if they’re worth my precious time… (no lah.. I still love my BFFs. I’m just annoyed at them for being so clueless sometimes).
And Smelly… he is number one in irritating me. grrr!!!! I cannot be mad at him no matter how hard I tried cos he got a joker face that will make me laugh whenever I look at him when I’m angry. Wtf. he STILL calls me fat and it’s mad annoying lor!!!! sidenote: kena nag for spending so much and owing still a lot. Pfft. But he just bought GT5 for like 300bucks and he have not gotten a console yet! Wtf. who is spendthrift now eh?
Monday, November 29, 2010
I Love Medal!
starting gym in December. this time is for real. (shush! don't splash cold water... talk to the hand)
still sober at 23:40 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: gym, Monday Loves, weekends
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
I Love Bing Tang Hu Lu
still sober at 12:31 0 drunkard(s) vomited
Labels: glutton dy, Monday Loves, travel